In Permanent Beta

Set Boundaries.

By September 11, 2016 #inpermanentbeta
Set Boundaries.

If you want peo­ple to know where you draw the line, then you need to learn to set bound­aries.  With­out bound­aries, rela­tion­ships in busi­ness and in our per­sonal lives can­not func­tion well.

Forc­ing peo­ple to make their prob­lems our own is a sub­tle form of manip­u­la­tion.  I do not want to dis­cour­age any­one from help­ing oth­ers, but I am say­ing that we should try not to rob peo­ple of their prob­lems.

Accord­ing to Greg McK­e­own, author of Essen­tial­ism, “We should serve, and love and make a dif­fer­ence in the lives of oth­ers, of course.  But when we make their prob­lem our prob­lem, we aren’t help­ing them; we are enabling them.  Once we take their prob­lem from them, all we are doing is tak­ing their abil­ity to solve it.”

So when you find your­self wor­ry­ing, fret­ting and exert­ing your ener­gies to keep “them” going, as it turns out, they no longer have the prob­lem because you have taken it from them and made it yours.

Forc­ing peo­ple to solve their own prob­lems is equally ben­e­fi­cial for you and for them.”

Bound­aries are Essen­tial

Demar­cate what’s off lim­its and do so in advance.  Money and time should be equally impor­tant.  Don’t let any­one take either for their sole ben­e­fit.  This is true in every area of life, includ­ing and spe­cially in our jobs.

What would your boss say if you brought your chil­dren to work on Mon­day or any day of the week that you are required to work?  Think about this for a moment.

If you can’t bring your chil­dren to work on Mon­day, then why should you be expected to bring work home with you on a Sat­ur­day or Sun­day?

No is a com­plete sen­tence.” Anne Lam­ott

Set Bound­aries.  Set them Early.

For bound­aries are, “a lit­tle like walls in a sand­cas­tle, the sec­ond we let one fall over, the rest of them come crash­ing down.”

You Might Also Like

Design Your Life

By August 17, 2016 #inpermanentbeta, Chronicles of Irís

DesignYourLife

 

Good day, amaz­ing and won­der­ful human beings.  I’m so excited about today’s blog post, I could hardly wait to share.

Here’s a secret, we all want to be happy.  We all want love.  We all want to feel impor­tant.  We all want to live mean­ing­ful lives.

Deep down, we want to be accepted–we want to be liked.  We want to live a life that’s ful­fill­ing. We want to feel good about our­selves, our con­tri­bu­tions and our unique­ness.

We are one of a kind.  You, me, your neighbor–we are all unique. There isn’t any­one out there who is exactly like you.  God does not make mis­takes.  You were born good enough.  You are enough.  Period.

God is pre­cise and quite cal­cu­lated.  He wants the very best for you, even if at times we feel for­saken.  He gave us broth­ers and sis­ters, neigh­bors and col­leagues so that we could lean on each other, help one another.

I invite you, beau­ti­ful peo­ple, to design a life exactly as you want it to be.  The pos­si­bil­i­ties are end­less, dear friends.   What is it that you want in every area of your life?

Here are some cat­e­gories that are impor­tant for many peo­ple.  Think about the fol­low­ing as it per­tains to your life and write one thing you want to accom­plish in each area:

  1.  God, Reli­gion, Spir­i­tu­al­ity
  2.  Fam­ily
  3.  Career
  4.  Per­sonal
  5.  Finan­cial
  6.  Phil­an­thropy & Giv­ing

Money is impor­tant because it can buy expe­ri­ences, but fam­ily, our health, and most impor­tant feel­ing ful­filled is the surest way to bring hap­pi­ness into our lives.  And isn’t that a uni­ver­sal desire…to be happy?

Start now.  Design a life that will make you feel won­der­ful.  Find hon­est work that you are both excited and eager to get to.  I promise, it exists!  Start with one area at a time.  Develop rou­tines so that you can free up your poor, over­worked and over­loaded brain.  Focus only on a very few things at a time.

Time is going to pass any­way, why not spend it your way?  You can have it your way.  Stick around and I’ll show you how.

As always, thank you for read­ing.  Don’t for­get to sub­scribe, fol­low me on Face­book & Twit­ter, and share with your friends.

Xoxo,

Irís

 

 

 

You Might Also Like

Every Day Productivity: Reading Effectively

By July 14, 2016 #inpermanentbeta, Chronicles of Irís, Lifehack

It’s July 2016 and I have man­aged to read 18 books so far this year; this is a record high for me.  I have always enjoyed read­ing, but could never seem to find the time to do it con­sis­tently.  I’d binge-read over a hol­i­day or quiet week­end and sit for hours at a time.  This was not a very prac­ti­cal strat­egy.  Unless you’re retired, do not have chil­dren to care for, bills to pay or you hap­pen to read for a liv­ing, you just won’t have the time to read for hours at a time.

I do have some good news for all my closet-bookworms and book enthu­si­asts.  I have some awe­some tips on how you can read more often, retain the infor­ma­tion you’re reading–thus get more value–and become a con­sis­tent reader.

Sound inter­est­ing?  I’m excited, too!  Let’s go. Con­tinue Read­ing

You Might Also Like

What’s a Pencil Worth?

By June 2, 2016 Chronicles of Irís

My mom shared an inter­est­ing story with me. Over the long week­end, my par­ents vis­ited a fam­ily in Ense­nada. My dad had met the father in a pre­vi­ous visit. She described them as a very lov­ing unit with high val­ues, morals and integrity. She also said that they were incred­i­bly poor. My dad knew this in advance so my mom packed a few toys my nephews donated and clothes to give to them, but she had no idea how bad it was. I’m also sad that she didn’t tell me this in advance, I would have put together a gift bas­ket with a ton of books and good­ies as well . Con­tinue Read­ing

You Might Also Like

Start Your Morning the Night Before!

By May 17, 2016 Lifestyle, Work

Do you find your­self fraz­zled every morn­ing as you’re get­ting ready to head to work, drop the kids off at school or head to school your­self?  You mum­ble, “why me?”

You vow to do some­thing about it right away, and then the next morn­ing repeats itself, much like clock­work.

Here are some things you can do to jump-start your morn­ing.  Lay out what you’re going to wear the night before.  If you carry a brief­case, back­pack or purse, make sure it is ready and near the front door.  Add cof­fee to the cof­feemaker the night before, set out non-perishable break­fast items, such as dry cereal and a bowl, if that’s what you nor­mally eat in the morn­ing.

I will give you a quick glimpse of how I spend 15 min­utes the night before and 15 min­utes each morn­ing.

My hus­band, Ter­rance and I are very rou­tine.  We eat pretty much the same things for break­fast (lunch and din­ner) Monday-Friday. Con­tinue Read­ing

You Might Also Like